Time Flies

My countdown is already beginning. A little over 10 weeks till August 24th. It seem's like I just graduated yesterday, but you blink and what do you know, its already been over a year. But so much has happened in this past year too.

I'm relieved to be leaving. This limbo of not doing anything has gotten really old. I know they tell you not to, but I really did put my life on hold for the Peace Corps. Instead of grad school or pursuing a long-term job, I took whatever I could get to be in Irvine with Sophie instead.

I've been collecting things I'll be needing with me in St. Kitts. A sleeping bag for warm weather, a crank flashlight, a swiss army knife, bed sheets, etc. Made a big bag of clothes I haven't worn, or know I won't be taking with me, to give away. I'm already looking at everything in my room, thinking, I won't be needing this. I feel like packing everything up right now, but at the same time, I'm not quite ready yet. It's so close, but so far away. Reality is hitting me. How sad is it, that the other day I was looking at my baking supplies in the pantry, thinking about how I won't be able to use any of this stuff for over 2 years. I won't have my silicone mat, or my favorite measuring cup, or the awesome oven I've grown to love. I won't have a Ralph's or Alberton's right around the corner to run to when mid-baking I realize I don't have a particular ingredient.

And most importantly, I won't have Sophie or Amar peeking over my shoulder to see when they can sneak a taste of whatever just came out of the oven.

But then I think about how I will be making new friends and going through a whole new experience. There will be new friends to test recipes on =) And to learn so much more from. Reading Alisa's blog today, and how she just couldn't put her experiences into words... It made me even more excited. But also a little sad that I'm not really going to be able to share this experience.

I still don't really know what to expect. But that's part of what makes this so great. I'm going in without a concrete plan, and I'm going to have to learn as I go along. But it scares me at the same time. I don't know where I'll be living, I don't know where I'll be working, I don't know anything about what my lifestyle is going to be like. I don't even know where my orientation is going to be yet! But most importantly, I don't know how my work is going to help. Or exactly what my 'work' is even going to be. And isn't that the whole point of this? Of leaving for over 2 years... but all I can do is wait.

I'm excited, and nervous, and scared. I want to leave now, but then I want to stay a little bit longer. I want to be able to experience something so amazing that I won't know how to explain it, but I also want to share something so important with the special people in my life. I want to know everything, but I also want to just let things unfold. I'm a little all over the place.

But what else is new?